Bedrest Limbo

I have been surprised and pleased by the response to my last post. It never ceases to amaze me that my uncensored stream of consciousness writing sometimes hits a chord with others. Apparently a lot of people struggle with their own life choices as well, and the whole "grass is greener on the other side" syndrome. Good to know I'm not alone. Thanks for commenting!

My mom is leaving this afternoon to head back to Minnesota for a long weekend. After 4 full weeks of waiting on us hand and foot I think she deserves it. I keep telling her she should pack up everything, rather than just a weekend bag, in case she decides she likes her old life too much and doesn't want to come back. She's assured me she does, but I would understand otherwise.

This past week has been harder than previous weeks. Now that the baby is big enough that she would most likely be just fine if she was born (and even get to come right home!) I am struggling with lying down and taking it easy. At the beginning when I absolutely HAD to it was easy. Now that there seems to be more wiggle room it's harder.

I am still knitting a lot and enjoying watching some old favorite shows (Felicity, Friends), and some new ones (Pushing Daises), while doing so. It is growing increasingly difficult to not get up to clean and organize, especially to take care of tasks that I know won't get done for months once the baby is born (cleaning out junk drawers, my desk, the buffet etc.)

I'm obviously excited to reach full term (37 weeks, 2 weeks from tomorrow) but am preparing myself for an anticlimactic arousal from the couch. My body is completely shot and even though I won't HAVE to lay down anymore I know that I still will be sitting around a lot because I am huge and my muscles are weak from all of the laying down. I also am already starting to feel SO ready to have this baby. I am so huge and uncomfortable and I know that if I make it to 37 weeks I most likely won't have the baby right away and will be waddling around for a while still unable to do much. I still hope this is the case though, as opposed to the alternative. It's just a weird state of limbo to be in.

Ainsley was up extra early this morning (5:38) so I'm looking forward to a little nap later, other than that it will be another day of sitting and knitting. I'm currently working on a red fall sweater for Ainsley and a teal felted stocking for the new baby. I'm starting to doubt my ability and motivation to finish all of my projects before the baby comes. We'll see!