Summer Solstice

The hippy in me always wishes I celebrated the solstices more.  I mean any excuse for a celebration right?  Perhaps a late night bonfire or a baking of sun bread, SOMETHING. At least I mentioned it to the kids right?

Despite it only being the first true day of summer we are surely already in the thick of it.  This week is the first full summer whammy with no camps or classes and just us 4, 10 hours a day.  To make it even more interesting it rained the first three days of the week taking parks and beaches and bike rides out of the mix.

It's been alright.  The kids fill their days on their own mostly.  I orchestrate meals and crafts sometimes but other than that they're off.  It's weird and sad to be in this stage of life.  I'm not good with change.  I'm trying and praying I make peace with it soon.

For now I'm leaning on what I know which is diving into my own making and planning the bits I know the kids will glom onto.
I'm suddenly wanting to change everything about the first floor of our home.  After painting nearly every room at the end of the winter I now want new couches, consoles, coffee tables, rugs, art, shelves.  Of course to get this all at once is a tad cost prohibitive so I'm having fun searching and planning.

For now I'm focusing on what I can do relatively cost free.  I got this idea to make a ladder bookshelf for our living room and mere minutes later I spotted an old wooden painting ladder in a neighbor's dumpster bag.  I knocked and asked for it.  He WALKED IT TO OUR HOUSE FOR ME.  Today I found scrap wood for shelves and borrowed  a sander from my dad and bought stain and screws.  I'm so pumped for that shelf.

Other than that I'm focusing on the art.  I have two paintings to finish but am feeling like the house is pretty "Becky's paintings" heavy already so in looking for alternatives I found an idea to use a hula hoop as a giant circular loom and am excited to try out some weaving for the brick wall above the fireplace.
I don't know what's spurred it but my creative side is exploding and there simply aren't enough hours in the day anymore.

Aside from my personal to do goals I find my children are always so present in my mind.  They have all grown up so much and I find myself having to write down their current interests and passions just to keep it all straight.

Ainsley is as vivacious as ever.  Tonight when she was supposed to be getting in the car getting buckled she was instead pogo sticking on the driveway.  (keep in mind this was after a LONG day of not listening)  Me: "So do you just not know the right thing to do, or do you not care? It has to be one of those two".  A: "Oh, I just don't care".  AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!  This kid drives me WILD just about every 10 minutes.  So wild that I can find it hard to remember the good stuff a lot of the time.  Tonight I'm thinking about her resilience, how all it takes from me is a sincere I love you and a bear hug and she still melts into my arms.  She's SO into chemistry.  She's still super into her dolls. They always have injuries and ailments, always.  She still mostly doesn't read much (yet tests in the 90th percentile for her age :oP)  She prefers non fiction like the Guinness Book of World Records or Chicken Soup for the Preteen Soul.  We got in a drag down fight at the library about her wanting a Jodie Picoult novel and sex and love and me saying NO WAY!!!!  Also she stole my new razor and hid it in her room because she's desperate to shave her legs.  I can't make this stuff up guys. 
Ainsley loves to create and make and always has a plan.  She loves her friends and wishes she was old enough to stay home alone.  She's looking so old to me and gorgeous and it's terrifying and heartbreaking, but I guess it's the way of it.  Hoping for a good summer with my girl.

I can hardly belive that Louise is going to be in upper elementary next year.  She's not even 8 yet!!!! But third grade it is and I am so thankful that I have no worries with her and school.  She loves to do work.  If I motivate to make a list she'll check off each box until they are all done.  She's my little reader and I almost regret showing her how to request books at the library.  She has her nose in at least 3 or 4 at a time.  She's sticking tight to her proclamation that she will never get married or have children and just wants to be an artist living above our garage.  I'm secretly putting pennies a jar for that apartment girl, I'd love that too.  She could draw and write and play and laugh all day.  She is so deliciously innocent and young and I just want to bottle her up.

Felix is still my sweet little rambunctious guy.  He is super easy going  yet somehow VERY opinionated all at once.  He is so ready for school next year but my heart breaks for him because he loved preschool and his friends so much and all that is changing for him.  He's the first of my three to really latch on to friends so young.  He's had playdate after playdate this summer.  I can drop him off anywhere and he's happy as a clam.  He's such a breath of fresh air after all the emotions and worries I deal with with my other two.  I catch myself feeling so very sad about him going to school because I loved our time together so much these past few years.  We had three whole years where it was just us two after preschool.  I didn't have that with either of the girls.  Everytime I see a caribou I'm going to miss him begging me for mango smoothie and everytime I go workout I'm going to miss having him to pick up after. It's the end of an era for me as a mom and for Felix and I as a duo.  That feels hard right now.

I hope this midsummer finds you all well.  I am so thankful for the weeks ahead before the hustle and bustle of school.