Hump Day Nuggets:: Settling

For a girl so opposed to change I've grown quite accustomed to it.  

It's the nature of life, certainly THIS time of life with little ones and budding careers and ambitions, to be constantly in flux.  To cope I've had to jump in with both feet, hands and head too.  I abandoned a whole lot when we married and moved, and as our family has grown, quite out of necessity.  If I clung to too much from my childhood, from home and all that meant, it was just too hard.

Perhaps it's a bit too that I never was a rebellious kid.  If anything I was annoyingly compliant. So now in these middle adult years of mine I've been searching voraciously for my own voice.  Turns out?  That voice of mine is very deeply rooted in home and family and all those things that I've tried not to miss so dearly.

After having a half weeks worth of meal planning go down the drain thanks to family wide stomach flu, I had a bit of an "ah ha" moment.  Why do I make cooking so HARD?  I plan these ridiculously elaborate meals on weeknights, spend way too much on groceries and at the end of most days all I really want to do is heat something up for the girls and sip wine with my boy once they're in bed.  So I've revisited my recipe box.  The one my mom filled with hand written family favorites as a wedding-now-your-all-grown-up gift.  I've been so focused on finding my own new favorites in the kitchen that I've forgotten about all of my old favorites.  Plus there's something pretty magical about cooking from a recipe written by a familiar comforting hand.

And it's not just the recipes, this new sewing fettish has brought me back as well.  To my days as an 8 year old making doll dresses with my patient mama.  Really mom, how did you find time to do that with JUST me with three other kids underfoot?  I remember being in awe of her, how she just made stuff and it was beautiful and perfect.  It felt ridiculous that I could ever be like her.  Now I'm proud to say that I feel very much like my mom most days.

Mostly?  I'm finding a way to live here and there.  To allow myself to feel sad about being far away, and thankful for this home we've found, all at once. This week it feels really good to be in two places, finally finding a balance between old and new.  Really settling, in every sense of the word.

Nuggets::

Louise has started showing interest in the big girl pot.  No true successes yet, but seeing as she's been terrified whenever I've tried sitting her on it I'm pretty pleased.  And really?  could those thighs look any cuter on that white porcelain?

Nuggets::

After quarantining ourselves for the three day incubation period our flu had we were DESPERATE to get out.  I tagged along to the big conservatory, a regular daddy daughter date spot, and we had a great time.

 Nuggets::
Life has gotten (dare I say it?) much easier with Ainsley.  I know a lot of people say 3 is worse than 2, but so far I am LOVING 3.  Ainsley is mostly so sweet and helpful and can articulate herself wonderfully.  She's shed so much of her baby-ness and who I see emerging is a sensitive, imaginative, active, sweet child and I'm really really proud to call her mine.

::family kinect night...here they were running to first base, 

and let me tell you, there's nothing much cuter than seeing Louise run in place:

 Nuggets::
Valentine's Day was wonderful.  I don't see it so much as a day of romance, but an excuse, a reminder to do something a little special for those in our lives that we may take for granted.  So I made heart shaped chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast, gave the girls matching appliqued shirts and oodles of new books.  We read the morning away and Ainsley delighted in handing out her homemade Valentines at playschool.  We had a friend Valentine's party in the afternoon and came home to a vase full of beautiful red flowers from Ian (10 for me, 1 for Louise and Ainsley each).  I made salmon for dinner and flourless chocolate cake for dessert.  Auntie Sonya joined us.  It was really such an effortless wonderful day.  I'm blessed to have so many Valentine's in my life.

 ::the girls helped me make some treats for their friends::

::the brood!::

 ::sugar coma commencing::

:: family shot with dessert::

 ::my littlest Valentines::

 ::I prompted "cheese!" and they both said cheese and did the Wallace and Grommit hand motion for cheese, can you tell what we watched while down with the flu? :o)::

I feel so blessed to have all this love and joy in my life.  We have such fun us 4 and while moments are hard and lonely I am thankful for this time just us to settle into who we are.  I'm a lucky girl, that's for sure.

This week I'm enjoying the tasks of sorting through summer clothes for our Florida trip next month, making simple favorites in the kitchen and continuing to craft every chance that I get, because goodness how else is it going to all get done!

Happy Hump Day!